Laugh!!

Why do people laugh to their mistakes or sins. 

Is there anything to laugh at !

Maybe because they just don't want that their mistakes be expose. I mean they don't want to be like somebody else....

I know that people are always like that....

Will, someday they will find themselves to have a feeling like what I feel....

I just want to trust God for everything, I know he will do anything for that... or for them... 

But most of all, I want them to change...

Like just for a little bit... It will help...

I know that everything is possible...

But I also know that God had to do something incredible for them...

 

i rather cry!!

Why do I always find myself crying... Am I destined to be like this..

Well, maybe someday someone will be on my side. I know God give this all to me because .....

 Someone will hurt their feelings too.... and someone will revenge on them...

 

 

Let the True Love Begins

well, maybe I'm starting to have a nice atmosphere when it comes to my lovelife..

I'm just wondering now, oh what happened to the feelings I've felt for almost a year. It's kind of disappearing or kind of dissolving, hehehe...

well, I'm so happy for that. I'm like!, Hey Is that Him? Oh, he was that! But was like, ah, yeah, him... Like just smiling whenever he appeared on my mind. Kind of oh, its just you, I'm fine now.

 Maybe the best word to describe is "I'm starting to recover!". Or maybe the best among the rest is "I'm over you!". Yeah, that would be very better and best. 

I'm hope so! Yeah, really I am..

Well, what about the next blog....

Let's find out...

 

how can i forget you?

I hate myself for loving you so much!

I hate it coz it grows stronger and bigger than before!

I hate you coz you broke my heart!

 

It's almost a year of heartache. I want to forget him so badly. The question is how? Why do when I'm alone I always find myself thinking of him. Do I love him that much? Why I have to feel this way?

 

Are we meant for each other? Maybe not, coz I'm just the only one who keep on thinking of him and maybe or yes, loving him. I was always asking myself if he is thinking of me, like I do? I hope he feel the same way too.

I feel so crazy always when he suddenly came into my mind.  I think of future and everything! How can a guy like him can be erase into my damn head!

Nothing happened to us for you (who will read this) to know. It's just a kiss on my lips. So, this blog doesn't mean that I'm in the part of being obsess with something. I know that you (reader) might think that I'm obsessed coz something happened between us. But no, we haven't do that thing.

It's just I'm really maybe still madly inlove with him! And maybe I want to be with again!

Oh, I'm crazy about him! 

Oh no...

I don't why there's a lot of people who always wanted to take revenge for just a very simple thing. Why don't they just realize that the person was right and he/she had the right to do those thing.

Why putting the person in a bad state. Why making her/him suffer from those trials. Why not letting those thing to happen. Why they have to do that?

I was so unhappy and I am totally stupid enough for those guys. Why I was that kind of person. Why they want me to get hurt. I just did what must suppose to be done. Why getting me into trouble. I hate people who make other people unhappy.

I' m so mad and temperate person. But in this kind of situation I just wanted to cry and cry. I'm totally messed! I hate myself. But I must love myself. I truely a stupid person.

Oh God, please help. Why there's a lot of people who used to be like that. God please help me. Why they making me sad.

I really want to go to another place. I wanna get out of here! How many months do I have to suffer this kind of fate. Why I have the attitude like that! Easy to be destroy I mean being so sensitive and not being respected. I do respect them but why it end up like this. I am really that kind of person.

I really want to work far away. I want to be free. I really hate myself. I always wanted to ask God why he had to do that to me. Why he had to make me suffer from this kind of situation. Why there's a lot of people fooling me around.

Big Problem?
Mood:  don't ask

Well, This time I feel so angry with my costumers. They have debt and the worst is I'm the one who will going to paid for it! So sad, but its true! Damn I don't know what to do...I was very sad when I first heard the news! But it's okay...it will be okay and there's no problem that has no solution.

 

This night was worst it made me cry coz one of our costumer didn't paid his computer rental. I was unhappy and angry that I want to explode my feelings towards that costumer. Well, after that, I just cry..Oh a big cry baby..as always.

 

I pray that I will not pay the debt coz if it will deduct in my salary, what is left for me? There's none! Oh my, I was so down!!

 I don't know what to do.. 

 

But it's okay I know God is always with me!

 

 

 

Let's Get the Party Started!!
Mood:  happy

 Well, at last I really found myself happy for what I have now (love life). I'm really glad that I found that I really in love with my boyfriend Mark. He's so kind and very caring. I really love the way he was with me. I found myself safe and happy. When we walk in the sidewalks, I always found him very caring and gentleman. That was I want in my boyfriend. He was so sweet too. I'm hoping that this relationship would last or be forever. I love him so much. I know he love me too.

 

 The best relationship is when he love you more the way you love him. I know it was like our relationship right now. Mark is younger than me BUT its okay. He was mature enough when it comes to relationship. I'm so happy for that!

 

 I wishing and hoping he will never change his attitude towards me. I was also hoping that his feelings for me will grow stronger and sweeter. Me, I'm hoping that me too, will never change my feelings towards him.

 

 I know were in love with each other. And every single moment we shared was the most happiest moment we ever had.

 

Mark:

    I love you so much!!....

    Take Care always!!...

    Kissesss!!!!!

                                      - Ghynne

 

 

 

 

Please Stop!
Mood:  a-ok
I was hoping that this is my last entry of my 3rd boyfriend.
I was hoping that this will be the last tear that will fall from eyes.

I wish he will be just as the other ex-boyfriends I had before.

I don't wanna think of him anymore!
I found myself crazy because of him!
I don't know what to do!
How could I forget him?

I hate myself, I want to stop thinking of him BUT everytime I am alone I always think of him! He just came in my head. I know it's really hard BUT it's been too long. Imagine for almost 8 months that I cried, I am still like this. I really hate myself, how foolish am I to him.

He doesn't feel the same way, too, I know. But why I always think of him!

I hope God will help me. I think its a big problem! I'm so dramatic and a little bit pathetic! I hate pathetic people but Oh! I'm one of them.

I'm upset to what I feel. It's really hard when hearts is involved. I just want to cry!

He told me then "If our relationships will end up, what you're gonna do". I told him "I just want to cry and cry. I will cry and cry!" Damn! That's what happening to me for almost 8 months!. I'm sick of crying but there is really a tears falling down my eyes.

I don't know what I want. I don't want him to be my boyfriend again! But I'm just confused why I love to think of him, anyway! Maybe because I'm not fully inlove with my boyfriend right now. Maybe because I love him not as much as I Love Marwin!.

I love Mark. I love him very much! I'm just wishing and hoping that my heart will be fully occupied with the love for Mark and not 1/4 or 1/2 of Marwin.

To Marwin:
I wanted to talk to you personally about what I felt for almost 8 months. I wanted you to know that I did those things (call off) because of being selfish, I wanted you to change. I know its really hard to put away all those vices (cigarettes and alcohol). You know why I didn't want you to be with me again after one month of our call off because I saw you smoking.

There is a thing called three-month rule, if a couple had a call off and it lasted for 3 months, you must find another. What happened to us, is not 3 months it's just 1 month and few days. I found out that you already had a girlfriend for almost 3 months. Meaning, when we were dating you already had a girlfriend. You didn't even tell me about that! I think I am crazy! Thinking of this things!.

My boyfriend now told me that it was been June when you got a girlfriend. I was surprised! You're really one of a kind! Oh no! Not one of a kind, you're like those guys who love to be called Two-timer.

All that I hate was why you didn't even told me about that? I will be considerate because I love you that time. I will let you choose between us! It's fine with me, if you choose her. But what happen is really different!

Before I agreed to our relationship, I think first that you will going to hurt and made me cry! I didn't got wrong! You almost did! I'm not surprise. " I hate you " that was I wanted to tell you. But you know what, I miss you a lot! You became a nice boyfriend to me but sometimes no. It's Okay, there's no perfect person in this world.

I was hoping that you will put away all your vices. I want you to be healthy.

Thank you for loving me. Thank you for being nice, sweet and caring to me! I really appreciate it! Thanks for the foods you gave to me then! I love it! Thank you so much!

I must admit now that we're not really meant for each other. Sorry for what mistakes I did! I must accept that everything is the beginning of a true happiness.

"Think of a breakup this way: you're one step closer to the one you're meant to be with."

Take care always!

I hope you will read this blog someday! Or this blog will be read in a popular place or time.

Well it's the End!!
Mood:  party time!

The end!

Oh, maybe it is!

I'm crazy thinking of him! Damn it! He's such a most folish person I ever met!

Oh he got two girlfriends! Wow, it is cool! I don't want to think that it was completely the other side were I knew him!

Maybe it's time for me to get real! Right? Stop thinking that man! He's crazy like me BUT too crazy or crazier than me! 

Oh, why God always wanted me to think of him?

I always wanted to ask God why He always wanted me to think of that guy!

Why?

I just hope he will be erase in my damn head!  

 

Surprise
Mood:  surprised

OMG!!

 I was typing my costumer's report and suddenly someone is looking at me in the door. I looked and I was surprise what I saw! I saw my 4th boyfriend looking at me and saying "HI".

I was really surprise! Then after that he went to his cousin's house. I was thinking "Is he thinking that we still lover?". Then she went back to the shop saying to me"How are you?". I went out to talk to him. I said "I'm fine" and he said he got sick! He told me to text if I could.

 I don't know what to do? Do I have to text him? Do I have to tell him that I already had a boyfriend?